This is a whole book. I wish I had something that would give you joy, something to thank you for sharing yourself here. Please just accept my gratitude.
I have never identified with anything written about bodies and weight and self image more than this. Thank you thank you thank you for publishing this.
Even using Bumble BFF for me, I’ve found that I’m now like oh, let me actually do the yoga and soft drugs and book clubs and theatre shows that people I want to chat with do so I can have something to chat about too. I don’t know how I feel about it yet but soo la voo (it’s TikTok for c’est la vie).
This is stunning. I've read and enjoyed your substack for some time but this moved me to finally comment. As a marginal gay (thanks for that) who is also a resident physician prescribing lots of people semaglutide - so thought-provoking. I have to reread it and send it to my friends. I feel really moved in particular by your sharing what your experience has been like in clinic. It makes me sad that you were pressured to start a medication -- and makes me think more critically about how my interactions with patients may bring up feeling of judgment, rejection, or powerlessness in our fatphobic society. It sounds to me like you are taking care of yourself thoughtfully and well, even if not always perfectly smoothly or happily. I hope your doc is cheering you on, and if not, please take some kudos from this random internet MD. (PS- You may be interested to know that the diabetes society guidelines will likely be changing in the near future. The first line non-insulin medication will probably be semaglutide rather than metformin. Semaglutide in general is being viewed as a bit of a wonder drug at the moment- it's good for kidney disease and heart disease and weight loss and probably for everything else too!! Personally I'm skeptical that it's a panacea, but we will certainly see what happens. The idea of who 'deserves' ozempic for what reason is a fascinating one, will have to chew on that.)
I laughed, a lot. Dating apps are the bane and you didn’t even get to the explicit ones. The gay-black experience and then the gay-fat-black experience in metropolitan twink territories is worth a novel and a half.
Loved reading this! Uncanny how you kinda captured so many parallels in my own life at the moment. I recently started mounjaro and I’m fat, black, gay, and a new type-2 diabetic. The end of your essay is staying with me and now I’m interrogating parts of my own experience
I really liked this entry. I cried on the train the other day because a man said I need to move my big butt out of the way, and because another guy on the street said to me, "Hello, big lady." As I've gained weight the comments on my body start coming more often. It's been making me think about weight loss seriously, for the first time in my life. Not for my health, but to stop the comments. I don't know! It's difficult to be neutral on your body when no one else is.
I don't have anything as lyrical to add after reading this gorgeous writing, and yet, wanted to thank you for sharing something so tender that is made so hard by so many.
really loved reading this and hearing your experiences. it is personal and political and back to personal and social. the messaging about fat is so loud and has been for my whole lifetime. trying to hear your own self think and feel about it is hard. this felt like a noble attempt.
Beautiful and brave. Do you know Da'Shaun L. Harrison's book "Belly of the Beast" about anti-fatness as anti-Blackness? Highly recommend. Good luck with the Peloton. I am a highly sedentary gay who just gave up my YMCA membership.
This is a whole book. I wish I had something that would give you joy, something to thank you for sharing yourself here. Please just accept my gratitude.
I have never identified with anything written about bodies and weight and self image more than this. Thank you thank you thank you for publishing this.
Amazing, per usual.
Even using Bumble BFF for me, I’ve found that I’m now like oh, let me actually do the yoga and soft drugs and book clubs and theatre shows that people I want to chat with do so I can have something to chat about too. I don’t know how I feel about it yet but soo la voo (it’s TikTok for c’est la vie).
Really beautiful and honest. Forgive me if you're not into musicals, but I thought of A Strange Loop's dating sequence a lil while reading this.
This is stunning. I've read and enjoyed your substack for some time but this moved me to finally comment. As a marginal gay (thanks for that) who is also a resident physician prescribing lots of people semaglutide - so thought-provoking. I have to reread it and send it to my friends. I feel really moved in particular by your sharing what your experience has been like in clinic. It makes me sad that you were pressured to start a medication -- and makes me think more critically about how my interactions with patients may bring up feeling of judgment, rejection, or powerlessness in our fatphobic society. It sounds to me like you are taking care of yourself thoughtfully and well, even if not always perfectly smoothly or happily. I hope your doc is cheering you on, and if not, please take some kudos from this random internet MD. (PS- You may be interested to know that the diabetes society guidelines will likely be changing in the near future. The first line non-insulin medication will probably be semaglutide rather than metformin. Semaglutide in general is being viewed as a bit of a wonder drug at the moment- it's good for kidney disease and heart disease and weight loss and probably for everything else too!! Personally I'm skeptical that it's a panacea, but we will certainly see what happens. The idea of who 'deserves' ozempic for what reason is a fascinating one, will have to chew on that.)
You are loved and lovable. Thank you for your vulnerability and insight as always.
I laughed, a lot. Dating apps are the bane and you didn’t even get to the explicit ones. The gay-black experience and then the gay-fat-black experience in metropolitan twink territories is worth a novel and a half.
Loved reading this! Uncanny how you kinda captured so many parallels in my own life at the moment. I recently started mounjaro and I’m fat, black, gay, and a new type-2 diabetic. The end of your essay is staying with me and now I’m interrogating parts of my own experience
The Bravo gays would love a word😆🤧
Beautiful read. Couldn’t stop thinking about Laymon’s Heavy. Thank you your vulnerability.
I really liked this entry. I cried on the train the other day because a man said I need to move my big butt out of the way, and because another guy on the street said to me, "Hello, big lady." As I've gained weight the comments on my body start coming more often. It's been making me think about weight loss seriously, for the first time in my life. Not for my health, but to stop the comments. I don't know! It's difficult to be neutral on your body when no one else is.
I don't have anything as lyrical to add after reading this gorgeous writing, and yet, wanted to thank you for sharing something so tender that is made so hard by so many.
really loved reading this and hearing your experiences. it is personal and political and back to personal and social. the messaging about fat is so loud and has been for my whole lifetime. trying to hear your own self think and feel about it is hard. this felt like a noble attempt.
Brilliant, brutal, brave.
Man if I had to avoid adrenaline I think I would have to just stay in bed for two weeks 😂 best of luck staying safe, comrade!
Beautiful and brave. Do you know Da'Shaun L. Harrison's book "Belly of the Beast" about anti-fatness as anti-Blackness? Highly recommend. Good luck with the Peloton. I am a highly sedentary gay who just gave up my YMCA membership.